Lost in translation

The case for translating poetic masterpieces

 You may have wanted to share a poem written in your native language with a foreign friend, but you cannot find a faithful translation that can both convey the meaning, evoke emotions, and preserve the spirit of the original.. Have you ever thought of translating the poem yourself?

The problem persists

 There's much dispute whether poetry is translatable or not. I don't think it is sufficient to learn the language in which a poem is written to fully appreciate it and grasp its meaning. Oftentimes, it's crucial to get familiar with the socio-cultural atmosphere surrounding it.

"Poetry, indeed, cannot be translated; and, therefore, it is the poets that preserve the languages; for we would not be at the trouble to learn a language if we could have all that is written in it just as well in a translation. But as the beauties of poetry cannot be preserved in any language except that in which it was originally written, we learn the language."

-Samuel Johnson-

Inevitable sacrifice

 I was recently looking for a famous Arabic poem to share in English, and all I could find was a word-for-word translation. It was tasteless, heavy on my ears, and with absurd metaphors.
 Compare that with Edward Fitzgerald's English version of Rubaiyat Al Khayyam: style and eloquence, a truly reference work, yet often criticized by Persian native speakers for being an alteration, and a mere personal interpretation.
 To maintain the rhythm without straying from the poem's originality, a good translator should master this compromise, therefore s/he should be a poet at heart, because his/her task is harder than the poet's.

So what does it take?

 The major challenges are:
 Linguistic relating to syntactical structures, metaphors, idioms, images, similes, punned expressions..etc
 Aesthetic relating to rhyme, rhythm and meter, the flow of the words and the music.
 Cultural relating to the four major cultural categories "ideas" includes belief, values, and institution; "behavior" includes customs or habits, "products" includes art, music, and artifacts, and "ecology" includes flora, fauna, landscape, and weather.
 As for the method, it generally goes like this:
 -The first step is to get familiar with the author's personality by reading his/her biography, and exploring his/her other works.
 -The second step is to read the poem several times in order to understand it well and catch its rhythm. The pauses, the beats, the pace and the swirls of energy should be easily recognizable.
 -The third step is to take it apart, play with its components, then rewrite it from scratch without being too dogmatic about technique. You may add, remove or reorder some lines.
 Some tools to make life easier: thesaurus, and rhyming dictionary.

A good example

 The French translation of William Ernest Henley's "Invictus" is top notch.. not sure about other versions, so I included Italian, Spanish, Portuguese, German, Russian, and Hungarian let me know your impression.

Let's get to work!

 I came across this initiative by some "Douglas Hofstadter" who gathered around 40 English versions of a poem called "A une damoyselle malade" (To a sick damsel) by Clément Marot.
 You can find below the original, literal translation, and Hofstadter's 6th attempt. The not-so-common characteristics of the poem made it more challenging to translate.
 Can you give it a try? You don't have to match all the criteria set by Hofstadter. You can contribute to a similar project for this quatrain by János Pilinszky. Or maybe you have a favorite masterpiece, share with us and let us have fun.

Clément Marot	Hofstadter n°2	Hofstadter n°6
Original poem	literal translation	6th version
Ma mignonne, Je vous donne Le bon jour; Le séjour C’est prison. Guérison Recouvrez, Puis ouvrez Votre porte Et qu’on sorte Vitement, Car Clément Le vous mande. Va, friande De ta bouche, Qui se couche En danger Pour manger Confitures; Si tu dures Trop malade, Couleur fade Tu prendras, Et perdras L’embonpoint. Dieu te doint Santé bonne, Ma mignonne.	My sweet I bid you A good day; The stay Is prison. Health Recover, Then open Your door, And go out Quickly, For Clément Tells you to. Go, indulger Of thy mouth, Lying abed In danger, Off to eat Fruit preserves; If thou stay’st Too sick, Pale shade Thou wilt acquire, And wilt lose Thy plump form. God grant thee Good health, My sweet.	My sweet dear, I send cheer -- All the best! Your forced rest Is like jail. So don't ail Very long. Just get strong -- Go outside, Take a ride! Do it quick, Stay not sick -- Ban your ache, For my sake! Buttered bread While in bed Makes a mess, So unless You would choose That bad news, I suggest That you'd best Soon arise, So your eyes Will not glaze. Douglas prays Health be near, My sweet dear.

Behind the title: A quote by the american poet Robert Lee Frost defining poetry: "Poetry is what gets lost in translation."